I hate money! Because I don't have much of it. This is the third Christmas in a row where my gift purchasing power has been severely limited from that of the year before. All I can say is that it is a really good thing that I don't have a girlfriend this year. But I still have plenty of people I care about. Looks like this year I really need to get creative. Oh, hoooray! I can't even really imagine that it is Christmas on Saturday. I hope I'm not the only one.
I've been on break for about a week now and I've pretty much adapted to life back in Portland. I have been working at my old job, living at my mom's, going out, doing everything that I did before when I lived here. I'm not sure what people will be receiving from me for Christmas but I'm sure the gifts will be thoughtful. Oh wait, thoughtful requires thought. Right. So there's one plan for the day, get on the gift choosing/making ball. I don't wanna!
This is the time that I don't like. I have my last final tomorrow morning. So right now I'm just kind of idle. I'm studying but there is only so much one can study when one knows the material. Unfortunately, since I'm not sure how my teacher's test will be, we've never had a test before, I have a difficult time in gauging its difficulty. Likewise, the teacher provided us with four potential essay questions for which we should prepare. She will choose two of them and we will be required to write on only one. So she is forcing us to prepare for at least three of the questions in order to be prepared for the test. That is effective for us to learn the material but I also think it is kind of rude. It isn't a big deal. Whatever. I'm pretty sure there is one question she will definitely ask but I can't risk being up poo poo creek based on a hunch. However, if I study all the questions, I'll inevitably waste hours of time preparing an answer that I'll never ever ever ever ever ever need. That is the rude part. I just wish I could take the damn thing now.
My finals week is pretty low key this term. I had my math final this morning. I think I did ok on it. I couldn't raise my grade to an A so I don't have too much to worry about; I'd have to get lower than 72% on the test to get lower than a B. That isn't entirely out of the realm of possibility but I don't think it is much of a worry.
Now I just have to get prepared for my WGS final. It shouldn't be too bad except I am expected to know specific points that specific authors made in our readings. I wouldn't be surprised if we had more than 50 readings throughout the term. Some were really short and nearly inconsequential. This is why I bought and used a hi-liter throughout the term. Let's hope it pays off.
I just finished my Friday night self flagellation by watching Tucker Carlson's show on PBS. The difference between his right leaning show and the left leaning "Now" is in intent. Just watch Tucker's face, if you can stomach it. It is as if he knows his questions and statements are farcical and can't believe that he's getting away with the joke. I say, get rid of him. Jon Stewart had it right, he really is a dick.
Thanksgiving break leads into "dead week." A greater misnomer I have rarely encountered. Every class has something due this week and most of them have big stuff due. How can this possibly be called dead week? And another thing, why can't we just start our term two weeks earlier so that when we get off for Thanksgiving, that's the end of the term? The semester system made little sense to me in high school, winter break (actually called Christmas break at my Catholic high school) followed by a mere three weeks of class to finish the term. But this quarter system blows my mind with stupidity. The term is only twelve weeks long. It makes no sense to have a long holiday weekend right before the end of the term, especially if the term is followed by a three week break until the next term. The geniuses at University of Oregon really outdid themselves on this scheduling thing.
I have been super busy this week. Luckily I have a short reprieve for the Thanksgiving holiday but unluckily I have a few things due right after. So it'll be a nice time but not free of the hand of school work. That's ok, because school is my main priority right now.
In my gender studies class the other day we were having a discussion about welfare. I won't get into the meat of the subject but at some point I had to chime in and say that I felt we were, as a class, dehumanizing poor people and that everyone, no matter what their situation, has free will. Notice that I didn't say that people choose to be oppressed, raped, poor, etc. But next thing you know, that's the general point of view on my comment. To be fair, I think a lot of people agreed with me, but there was a lot of opposition to what I said. I didn't think I said anything controversial in asserting everyone's common humanity, but I guess I did. It exposed something that I've always found about extremists on either end of the spectrum (for these purposes the spectrum is a single line) who are so driven by ideology that they fail to examine reality. When I said that poor minorities have choice, I certainly didn't mean that they choose to be victimized by our society. I meant that within the circumstances that are beyond their control, they still have choices. That's it. Suddenly I'm a sexist racist. I actually believe that welfare for single mothers should be liberalized and that the 1996 welfare reform law was regressive, but to some I'm no better than people who decry "welfare queens" and think that welfare should be eliminated. I realized something though, I also have free will, and I refuse to debate with people who will not examine the ideas they hold. And I really refuse to debate people who dehumanize the people they supposedly wish to help. I'm thinking of one person in particular. You probably don't know her. She's in my class. I don't know her either, but she's an ideologue. To the majority of the class's credit though, they understood what I was saying.
Ideas are important, but when they cross the line to become unchangeable facts, that is what is dangerous to the world. As long as there is a dialog with a recognition that we are all people things are generally ok. Once we stop thinking of each other as people but mere support for ideas, that is when bad things happen. Do-gooders who assume some sort of superiority over the people they are trying to help make me angry.
I was randomly clicking around the web when I stumbled upon the solution to the current political problems.
It was really foggy the other morning. Here's a view of the library from across the quad. Spooky!
I've had a very nice weekend, of course, it isn't over yet, but I have to go to work soon and then do lots of homework after that so really, it kind of is over. After work yesterday I ran home (not getting easier yet) and watched the second half of the Oregon football game. They lost. Oh well, there's always next year. Or maybe the year after. Then I got a frozen cheese pizza and augmented it with a few of my favorite toppings. It went from drab to delicious. And I watched the second half of the second season of Curb Your Enthusiasm. It was good but not as good as the first season. I wanted to rent "My Architect" but it hasn't come out on dvd/vhs yet and then I wanted to rent "Eddie Izzard: Dress to Kill" but that was out. Things to look forward to for next weekend, maybe.
Today's plan:
I should be working harder on a paper I'm writing. I'm not concerned. I will get it done. The paper if for architecture 201 (intro to architecture) and is an analysis of the Musée d'Orsay in Paris. It is a giant building with a whole lot going on. I have my work cut out for me but I'm really excited. This weekend will see a large chunk get done. That's my mission both today and tomorrow.
Wow, this time is going so quickly. I'm amazed at how the term is just zooming by. But that is ok. I'm looking forward to the winter break as a time to regroup a bit. I'm also really looking forward to next term because I'll be taking some more intensive architecture courses. I just need to figure out some good electives. I talked to my counselor and he suggested I take classes that have to do with the physical world like geography, history, anthropology, stuff like that. Sounds good to me.
On another note, I've been feeling down lately, as I've recently written. I've been noticing that I've been spending a lot of time sitting down in front of the computer. I need to break away a bit. I have been for the past couple of days. I've been doing pushups, crunches as well as running to and from work. I'm sore but I actually feel really damn good. I hope I can keep this up. I think I'll check out the rec center over on campus and see what there is. I need to get a workout system going so I don't go insane. Plus, I need to stay sexy.
I'm a sophomore, I have 52 credits. I've also got a 3.18 cumulative gpa which is dragged way down by a D that I got six years ago. Oh well. The good thing is that I'm going to talk to my academic advisor and get some more of these general education requirements out of the way. General ed requirements can eat it. But the good thing is that I seem to be doing well on the long road to my degree. That is good.
Buy this shirt!
I think Rusty, my cat, isn't very happy here anymore. But I'm so used to her and her *ahem* idiosyncracies that I'm not 100% sure if she is unhappy or just being strange little self. I don't know if that makes sense. My problem is that my schedule is herky jerky, I'm home for short stints throughout the day but not for long stretches of time. I can't tell if this is bothering her or not. She seems somewhat accustomed to being by herself, something that she's had to learn. But when I get home she practically mauls me, like I'm Calvin and she's Hobbes, except I'm not as self important as Calvin. OK, that's not true, but she isn't as funny as Hobbes. I think I may have to give her back to the cat lady from whom she came. That makes me sad.
I have a tendancy to get bogged down and start focusing on lots of negatives in my life and the world. The last week has been particularly tough in that sense. So I'm going to try and stop focusing on those things by making a list of things that I'm happy about.
Matt's Happy List:
OK, this isn't working right now. I just feel like shit. School is going really well for me, that is true. And I really do like what I am studying. I think it is a great fit. But I'm tired right now. I'm sick of my schedule. I go to class in the morning and afternoon, then I have some time off before I have to go to work. That is it. Then on the weekends I work from mid morning to early afternoon. So I don't really have much time to sleep in. I am definitely sleep deprived. I'm sick of not being around my family and friends, more like friend, really. This is a problem, especially since my friend is also my former girlfriend. And I'm not completely over that situation yet. I know that the only way I can be is to just move on and I am moving on. But the fact is that I'm not interested in having a girlfriend right now so that leaves just a little window of unresolved feelings there. That is a peripheral issue. My main issue is that I'm lonely, a common problem in people who are just getting into school and away from their comfort zones. I have attended school before, but the loneliness that I'm feeling was with me before and was a large driving force in my decision to pack up and move back to Portland. That isn't going to happen this time. I need to figure out a way to cope with this. I'm not the most social person in the world and have a hard time really connecting with people. If I don't want to feel so lonely though, the only way to do that is to change certain ways that I see the world. I need to be able to let go of the fact that I'm not around the people I'm closest to. It is a fact that I am away from them. I can change it by quitting school and moving back to Portland. That isn't going to happen so...I have to deal with it, not dwell on it. I also have to accept the fact that my relationship with my former girlfriend has to change. We don't have the same relationship that we used to. That is a fact. The situation can't be changed so I must learn to accept it. The one thing that I do have complete control over is my social life here. I have the power to meet people and make friends. I've done this a little bit in classes and in very small ways outside of classes. I don't know why but I have a great aversion to asking people if they want to spend time together socially. I need to just ask someone who I like if they are interested in hanging out with me. The funny part is that to me asking if someone wants to hang out with me can be just as hard if not harder than asking if someone wants to go on a date with me. When I step back there isn't anything difficult about either of those activities. My biggest problem is what I'm doing right now, overanalyzing everything. I don't, but I should, just do things without thinking about them so much.
On that note, I need to get ready to go to work. I am learning to be self reliant. Self reliance is good but it is a pain in my ass.
I'm definitely not happy about the election outcome. I've been paying too much attention to the aftermath and something that is really bothering me about what people say is that the Democrats need to pay more attention to "moral values" and the people in the south and midwest. I understand what they are saying but I seriously disagree. I think this country is way too divided for that. If I get called (by association) a cultural elitist one more time I think I'm going to scream. If believing in equal rights for all people in this country is elitism, so be it. But there is no way I am going to compromise my values so someone in the south can get their way. Just none. So much handwringing is going on, why are we losing the south and midwest? The Democrats are losing the south for the same reason they lost the south after the civil rights act was passed, because the overwhelming feeling there is one of intolerance, in this case manifested as intolerance of homosexuality and abortion. To these people, moral values is a socially acceptable way of saying bigotry. I'm not sure the divides that caused the civil war are healed and I seriously doubt that Bush is going to make any moves in that direction.
Oh, one more thing. Why are Democrats and liberals called elitists for not speaking to the "heartland" and the people in the south and midwest not intolerant of outsiders? The Democrats haven't been able to elect a president since Kennedy from outside the south who wasn't an evangelical Christian. Why isn't that being addressed as a problem? Is it because they just won power? I think so. Well, I'm going to fight them. I don't have any interest in fighting them other than self preservation. They don't like people like me. To them I'm an outsider, an elitist. They are projecting.
As I said, I don't believe the civil war ever really ended. I don't want more violence but this system that allows geographic oppression fans the flames of these disputes. I don't feel like I live in the same country as they do, and who knows, maybe soon this won't be the same country. I can think of worse things.
I just found a quote I really like by Charles Eames, "I don't remember being forced to accept compromises, but I've willingly accepted constraints."
Very cool.
Today was a busy day for a while, now I've got some time until I have to be at work. I'm getting pretty good at managing my time which is paying off very well for me. I had my architecture project due today but also math and programming homework. I was able to get my architecture work done first, then math and programming between classes. Those things are easier to crank out than building designs, no matter how basic they may be. I figured out that someone in my math class is also in architecture so I'll probably start talking more to her. That could be an addition to my associates, which is pretty much what I have right now. And who knows, maybe one of these days someone will actually turn into a friend. To me, a friend is kind of a big deal so it takes a while.
I feel kind of yucky, I think it may be something I ate. I made a tuna sandwich for lunch that I thought tasted a bit weird. I guess I'll have to wait and see if I get botulism. Hopefully I won't because these are pretty pathetic last words.
Today we had a midwife talk about childbirth in class. It was interesting, but the thing I found the most pertinent is that she doesn't carry any type of malpractice insurance and doesn't believe that tort reform will stop the outrageous insurance rates that OG/GYN's pay. She thinks that insurance companies are the problem and regulations should be placed on them.
I liken the idea that lawyers are responsible for high malpractice insurance to that which says that cutting taxes for the rich will cause the poor to be better off. In other words, BS.
This is a three dimensional (of sorts) sketch of my first ever building design. Note the poor quality of my ideas and rendering. Boy, I know they aren't expecting the Guggenheim Museum or anything, but I have to admit, I am nervous about this. This isn't the final project, just a rendering to get things straight in my mind. I think it is about right. Now I just need to finalize it.
I just got home from my women/gender studies class. I swear, I could take that class all day. It is amazing how many things that we take for granted in our everyday lives that can be so easily refuted, like gender identity. I'd never thought much about why there are different gender identities, only that there are. Although I wouldn't consider myself on the extremely conservative end of the spectrum (accepting gender identities as natural) I am surprised at how many gender roles I've accepted at face value. For example, the idea of masculinity versus femininity. That concept is a societal construction, one only need look at history for evidence. Gender roles have changed over time and they continue to change. Not long ago, there was no such thing as marital rape, women outside of marriage were considered somehow deficient, and women could only do jobs like secretary. Not to mention the fact that women couldn't vote in the entire USA until 1920.
One of the best parts of the class is the focus on power structures and how privilege affects how people act and are treated in society. There are many different kinds of privilege but suffice it to say that I (white, heterosexual, male) fit the bill of privileged pretty much to a T. This is something I've been concious of for a long time, but it isn't really something that I've liked to think about. I get uncomfortable with the idea that I, just by virtue of what I am, have advantages over other people. I, like most of us, like to think that the only reason I am where I am is because I earned it for myself. And that is partially true, I make choices, I have free will, but everything we do is circumscribed by the society in which we live. We live by the rules of our culture, and my culture happens to say that I get a head start and the wind at my back. As someone who is privileged, I have to live my life with that in my head. I don't think that is such a bad thing, but the trick is not to obsess over or to apologize for it. Just to be concious of it.
Today we talked a little bit about different sexual identities, homo, hetero, bi, etc. I was surprised when I expressed the thought to the class that everyone has some capacity in them for hetero and homosexual activities, but that doesn't make someone necessarily straight or gay. Within the context of the class, that isn't really much of a revelation, but in a society in which we are trying to delegitimize homosexual relationships it is radical. I don't understand why it has to be. To recognize that our sexual proclivities need not be only one way or another should be a liberating experience, but people, almost all people, get scared by that. We define ourselves so much by our sexual preferences that we can't bare the thought of them being flexible. I confess, I'm pretty uncomfortable with the idea when I apply it to myself personally. I don't consider myself sexually attracted to men. But then I have to do what I've done with broader ideas and ask myself why? I don't know. I guess I could say that society has told me that being "gay" is bad. And it has. Society has told me that being straight is good. But how do I determine whether or not I really am that? I don't know, except I think I am. I am attracted to women. They make me feel funny. Men don't have that type of appeal for me. I think they don't, not just for physical reasons, though there is that, but for social and emotional reasons.
I'm not generally attracted to men for friendships because men can often be too concerned with being manly and putting up appearances. Of course, women do this too, but I don't find myself interacting much with those types. For whatever reason, either because men are more prone to it, or I am more prone to sniffing it out, men seem to be overly concerned with a facade of masculinity. And masculity often means needless competition which I can't stand. I'm not friends with people so I can figure out how to best them, I'm friends with them because I like them and I want to be around them. My friends make me better and I, hopefully, make them better. Consequently, I have very few friends. I've tried having more superficial relationships with people, and it just doesn't work for me. I tried going to a photography meetup a couple of times in Portland. I went with my friend and while we both had an alright time, the more I thought about the meetings after the fact, the madder I got. The theory behind something like that is for like minded people to come together and befriend each other. It doesn't work like that for me. The way I see it, photography is a superficial interest that I have, but doesn't necessarily reach to my core as a person. I've always felt this way. I was almost always the loner on sports teams that I was on. These were supposed to be places where we would surrender ourselves to the good of the group and I couldn't do it. I wasn't really concious of it at the time, I just thought I was a loser, but I am actually happy I am that way. This type of attitude leads to times of sadness but then again, so does everything. I can barely stand being in a group of people with whom I have little connection with. I can barely stand small talk. I guess you could say that I'm antisocial. I wouldn't necessarily shy away from that characterization. But I would add the caveat that that doesn't mean I don't like people, it just means that I like very few people. I'm against the social system that we have, so yes, in that way I am antisocial. I like people for their unique qualities, not their facades. Saying that probably makes me sound like I think I'm superior. Well, who cares? I don't think that I'm superior, just different than social norms.
How's that for a blog entry? Wow, I'm amazed and embarrassed but I stand by it mostly. If anything, it is how I feel right now. I don't know if I'll always feel this way. That's the great part about a discussion.
<song="Memories from Cats">Bye bye, little guy. We've had some good times. Have fun wherever you go.</song>
PS -- No cracks about me having a double chin. It must be a trick of the light. Or maybe it is because it is a close up and the camera adds 10 pounds it all went to my chin. Yeah, I like that.
Things are going pretty well for me today. I skipped math because I didn't feel like going without taking a shower and I didn't feel like taking a shower before I went. That kind of air tight logic has allowed me to sit in front of my computer all morning doing "research." I love doing research. On all kinds of stuff. Theoretically, doing so much reading online will make me more informed and articulate, but I think the reality is that web surfing is much like channel surfing. A big waste of time with very little retention. Oh well.
This cat situation hasn't been working out and the new one has to go back to the cat lady I from whom I got him. That makes me sad and leads me to the next problem which is what to do with Rusty. After a lot of debate with myself and others (you know who you are) and even crying (yes, I'm a wuss) I've decided that I need to give her up. I am in architecture school and it is going to get really intense soon. I'm going to have to spend all my free time in studio and it just will not be possible to give Rusty the attention that she'll need. I feel bad, but I do think that this will be the best solution in the long run.
By the way, yesterday I got my first project back from my introduction to architecture class. I got top marks on all aspects of both the paper and accomanying illustration. Booya!
I got back a math quiz I took on Friday. I got 75%. And I studied and did all my homework and actually thought I aced it. Shit. I guess that just means that I need to try just that much harder. It makes me somewhat nervous about how I'm doing in the rest of my classes. I don't really care that much about my math grade in the long run, I just need to pass, but when I work really hard and the best I do is a C, what happens if I slack off just a bit? A D? Oh well, this is a required class and I just need to keep plugging away.
Now on to the cat thing. I've now had the new cat for about 24 hours. And even though I've done my best to deny it, my other cat, Rusty, is a fucking asshole. She attacks him whenever she gets the chance. I don't know if she is trying to dominate him or what, but he's quite a bit smaller than she is and instead of fighting her, he falls down and hisses. I do think that eventually he may be able to dominate her but I don't know if he'll be too scared of her by then. The best I can hope for is to make sure that they are separated when I'm not here and try to keep some sort of peace when I am home. I want to make sure I keep giving both cats attention and hope that Rusty's attacks don't make him too meek. He seems to be farely resilient. I am just playing mother hen and I'm sure it isn't as big a deal as I fear.
You may recall that Bush kept hammering home the fact that Poland is a part of the "coalition of the willing" in Iraq. Turns out that Poland is now planning a pullout of their troops by the end of 2005. I wonder if Kerry will point this out. Maybe someone will ask a question about it during the town hall debate.
Talking Points Memo: by Joshua Micah Marshall: September 26, 2004 - October 02, 2004 Archives
Take a look, it is funny but horrifying. And they say that Dan Rather is the problem.
Rush Is Right: Expect Kerry to Break Rules, Media to Say Kerry Won Afterward
So I'm a sick person, I go to the Rush Limbaugh website and read his transcripts, but I find that it is a good way to learn what people on the far right are "thinking" when they are talking. But little pieces of truth have ways of coming out and biting people like Rush in the ass. At the end of the fifth paragraph Rush says:
I just don't think that in any kind of a 90 minute TV appearance that is broadcast nationally, I don't think for 90 minutes, you can hide who you are.This is a point with which I agree, and it was apparent last night. It was apparent that the effort to distort who John Kerry is has been so effective that he doesn't even remotely resemble that charicature. Likewise, the effort to portray Bush as strong, resolute, and decisive has been so successful that he doesn't resemble it slightly.
Of course, Bush supporters are finding reasons for his defeat and none of them puts Bush at fault. It is either the media, the unfairness of Kerry, even Jim Lehrer. This shows that Bush supporters are buying into the hype more than ever before. It is a sick kind of hero worship where anything that the leader does wrong is the fault of some huge, nebulous conspiracy. I'm not comparing Bush to Hitler, I don't think he's that bad, but there is something vaguely Nazi-esque about the way the right wingers follow and idolize this man. If only they could get rid of the Arabs, gays, and liberals, then there would be a perfect society.
If Bush wins this election, I think it will be a symptom of a greater sickness in the United States. It will prove my fear that the majority of people in this country don't desire honest, complex answers to complex problems but rather crave simplistic easy answers so the problems just go away. It makes me ill. I wonder where this country could possibly be heading. The next four years could put us back on the right path or take us to disaster. You know where I stand.
NPR : Bush, Kerry Debate Foreign Policy Goals
I've been thinking about this for a while. When Kerry first won the Democratic nomination I was quite lukewarm on him. But eventually I went to a rally he held in Portland and I was quite impressed. This seems to echo a lot of experiences. Many people say that they don't like Kerry based on media snippets, but when they see him in person or in an extended thing like in the debate, they like him better. Conversely, when I see Bush in an extended format such as his last press conference or tonight's debate I like him way less than I like the media's characterization of him.
What does that have to say about the way he is characterized in the media at large?
What was I thinking when I scheduled an eight o'clock class? It is staying darker later now. Yuck.
A real mixed bag today at school. Classes were fine, they seem like they'll be easy enough without being boring. I'm excited to actually get into some of the projects. Some even seem like they'll be really challenging. Unfortunately, I am kind of older than the average incoming freshman, and even though I do have some school under my belt, I am still, alas, a freshman. This gap became apparent to me today as I realized that I am the oldest guy in my classes. That is so weird to me. And I know that it won't be an issue forever, not after I really get into classes and start working with people, but now, superficially, it is driving me nuts. But I talked to my dad and he told me what I already knew, but it still made me feel better. I am on my own down here, but I'm not alone.
Today is the first day of school! I can't believe it, but I'm kind of nervous and a lot excited. I've been in and out of school so much in the last six years but I'm committed to making it work this time. That means I have to be one hundred percent committed. I've got a pretty good start. Awake before six, class at eight. Coffee, sandwiches already made. I'm proud of myself.
Oh yeah, and they are saying that Mt. St. Helens might explode again soon. We'll be keeping an eye on that.
I made a template for my blog last night but this morning, I decided that I could do better. And I think that I did, but only after many hours worth of yelling at the stupid blogger tags. It took me forever to figure them out, and I'm not 100% sure that I did. The template would look fine when it was just the template, but when I previewed it with content, one thing or another would enevitably break. And it all had to do with the <blogger> and <pageitem> tags. Eventually I figured that out but, like I said, it took me hours. Then when I narrowed it down to those things, I had to figure out why it was that the template was broken because of these. I only hope that I've finally got it. If I don't, I'll be compelled to go to it again for a long, long time. I can't be doing that. I've got school starting tomorrow. A lot of my difficulty also stems from the fact that I've limited my exposure to css. But in keeping with every other blogger, I decided to use it completely to format my page. I could have done it easily with regular html and tables, but I don't want to be a dinosaur. I guess I'm becoming an old dog though, because I had a hard time learning this new trick.
By the way, it is supposed to be a newspaper advertisement. Get it?
I've been watching a rerun of a Gore vs. Bush debate and it seems almost quaint in comparison to how I anticipate next week's debate. Come on, Kerry, smack him down.
This is how I feel after creating a new template for my blog. No longer energy to write a post. Bah!
Russ Meyer, a great American has passed. Rest in peace, you genius. May your afterlife be just as large breast filled as your life here on earth.
Wait, you can't score in womens' studies classes? Fuck!
Dear second Anonymous, whoever you are, thanks for the post. I'll be damned about the non sequitur thing.
OK, so anyone who may be reading this has probably gone to at least some college, and so have I but George W. Christ, college books are too expensive! Every time I buy books for school (admittedly not a regular occurance) I am outraged at their prices. I mean, my damn womens' studies book was like 61 dollars! Tell me a book ever written by a woman that could be worth that much. Math, computer science, sure, I can understand why those books can be so pricey, but at the expense of (further) unpopularity I will put forth the assertion that I don't need a book to teach me how to hate men and love women. Let alone one that costs 61 dollars.
Umm...so anyway...I don't think I'm going to say my name because then maybe someone from my class may figure me out and then out me in front of the teacher. I think I'm already going to have a hard enough time in that class as I expect to be blamed for everything from the corporate glass ceiling to high heels to the evils of douche advertisements. Hmm...maybe I should think about taking a different class. It is obvious that I may have an issue or two.
I really am a good guy. I swear.
PS -- Non-sequitor alert: I swear, if I didn't know better, I'd say my cat was letting a neighborhood dog into the apartment to use her litter box. I know I know, gross, but those turds are huge! Sorry.
I've had a blog of sorts before, somewhere else. I haven't posted there in a year and I haven't posted anything of any sort of consequence in even longer. That blog was very personal, intense, and difficult for me to sustain. That is a good thing. I was a bit of a spaz in those days. This one will be a little less personal, but still kind of personal, just not the same.
Besides, I've got lots of things on my mind these days, like politics. I recently moved to Eugene from Portland. In Portland I often listened to Air America but here in Eugene they don't have it broadcast. Now that I have internet access, though, I can listen to it to my heart's content. And I am. It makes me happy because watching the nightly news makes me feel like Bush is going to beat Kerry down. Hearing the shows on the radio and starting to explore some of the blogs out there is keeping my hope alive. I guess we'll have a bit of a better idea of what's going on after the first debate next week.
Shifting gears...school starts on Monday. I've been in and out of school ever since I graduated from high school, six years ago. Now, though, I am committed. I am going to do this. It won't always be easy and sometimes I'll feel like quitting, but I've got to stay strong. Right!
